Hello and welcome to this week’s episode! If you’re a regular listener, I bet you’re wondering what happened to last week’s episode. Well it’s an interesting story. I did share some of it on social media, but I had more to tell you here.
It has been one heck of a week since I’ve had my most recent challenge. – hence the title Rough Passage
When we face a life challenge , it causes us to act, reflect and reevaluate. That is exactly what I had to do.
I started my week with a routine appointment and watched everything go sideways from there. You know how you mentally prepare for many things? This time I was intentional with how I was thinking about my appointment. I know I didn’t feel as anxious as I normally would. I actually had a sense of peace. I didn’t want to play into all the crazy thoughts.
I had a wonderful weekend of adventure and discovery out of town prior to this appointment. SO I was going into this with a pretty good attitude..
Monday morning I had my scan, then after I had some lunch and met with the doctor. What happened next? Well, this one threw me.
I was feeling some discomfort and felt compelled to tell the doctor about it. It was one of those moments I questioned even saying anything…I didn’t want to make it something it wasn’t. It was uncomfortable but it wasn’t dire. it wasn’t crazy painful. I had done a lot of walking recently and climbing a lot of stairs and it could have been anything. But. I felt compelled to speak up…like I didn’t have a choice.
So, with that, I told them what was going on. it was decided that I would come back in six months for a follow-up scan. That was amazing! I was thrilled to hear the news. I started messaging everyone in the family that were waiting to hear the update. I was so looking forward to celebrating.
But, that didn’t go the way I thought. I went in for my scan and never really left…
Imagine getting good news and then watching it all fall apart. As we were driving away, I got a call from the doctor’s office that I needed to go to urgent care. My appendix showed up on the CT scan and it concerned my doctor, That along with my symptoms… well…That’s how I ended up never leaving.
Anyone who’s had an appendectomy chuckles when you say it was emergency surgery. Usually with an appendix it is. I think on the heels of getting a scan to make sure everything is ok, it was not the best time to hear those words.
Thank goodness for the scan. Who knows what could have happened if they didn’t catch it then.
“Timing is everything. Those little moments of inspiration or intuition should really be evaluated. I can’t say every time I’ve had a feeling that it was 100% going to be what I thought, but I’ve learned to filter through those thoughts and take action to the best of my knowledge. Just days before this appointment I felt like it was time to do something I had been considering…”
I decided I was going to get a tattoo. Just a small tattoo. I decided I was going to get a little anchor. to be my new reminder to Stay Anchored in life.
So many times we get distracted, redirected or just spiral out with life.
Small things can throw us off and big things can be devastating.
I was looking for another way for me to stay focused.
I wanted something simple and yet very symbolic. ⚓️
I love it and I think this is just perfect 😍
I couldn’t have timed it better. not even a week after I got the tattoo I was once again being challenged to be focused on what it is that I needed. And boy did I focus on that anchor. Do a lot of unknowns before surgery. I know they will be running pathology. I don’t think anything will come of it but it’s always a concern.
in an effort to understand myself a little better, I decided to look up
Louise Hay “Heal Your Body”. If you haven’t read or heard of it, it is a guide to metaphysical connections to “specific health challenges, You can find the probable cause for your health issue and the information you need to overcome it by creating a new thought pattern”. I have had this book for maybe 20 years. So I checked out appendicitis – Fear. Fear of life. Blocking the flow of good.
Affirmation: I am safe & relaxed. I let life flow joyously.
So, what is my fear? WHY would I have a fear of life?
How many of us have this fear?
Again another sign to look inward.
Evolution in life…
We are not meant to just survive, you deserve more from your life…we all do.
I’ve not been feeling like myself lately. I understand more now why that is. This recovery has caused me to take time to dig deep. When we’re going through something that feels like it’s beyond what we can handle it’s easy to fall back on finding excuses and going back to old habits and beating ourselves up. It’s hard to know where to start.
We all have the tools we need to get us through life. Sometimes we don’t remember where we left our tools, sometimes we forget the tools that we have. This past week has been discouraging to say the least. but I also know the value that has come out of it. I know that my story will help someone else understand that no one is immune to life’s struggles…me included.
I know everybody has challenges in life, but it sometimes seems there’s a group of us that feel like we get more than our fair share. I wanted to let you know that I too have to deal with these emotions, these challenges, these hiccups in life.
Last week’s episode didn’t appear because I was in the hospital. That’s how fast life can change and I know that. And the mental anguish I experienced because I felt like I let everyone else down was powerful but also short lived. I had to let myself off the hook because worrying about something I could do nothing about was counterintuitive to what I was trying to do. I was trying to heal and feel better. To get out of the hospital. I had to let myself have some time to just be.
So what did I do? I started taking small steps. Yep, once again I scaled back to doing things that are a priority. I let myself have the time to binge on my favorite show. I made sure I was hydrated and stayed on my modified diet. Following the doctor’s orders.
I don’t want to feel uncomfortable and sore but it is what I’m dealing with right now. Everyday I take a small step to working toward feeling better. I make sure I go for my walk and get moving to clear my head to start my day . Taking those small steps makes it easier for the transition back into normal life. It’s not perfect, it’s not pretty. Giving yourself grace and knowing that you’re doing the best you can for yourself is all you can expect. Life continues to wait for us to live it. and once we get to the place where we feel better, then we can get back on schedule then we can get back to what we believe is what we need to do.
I was watching my favorite series Mad Men. I tend to gravitate to the show whenever I need a reset. There’s something about watching someone else go through these trials and tribulations.
It spurred me to think outside of my life. To See things in a different perspective. It allowed me to escape and yet at the same time dig deeper into what I’m really feeling.
It’s interesting that one of the quotes that stuck out in an episode I just watched was “ Is that what you want, or is that what people expect of you?”. A definite thought provoking statement. I don’t know if I have an answer right now. But it is something I am thinking about.
Even though this recent experience was nothing like previously getting diagnosed, it’s still invokes similar feelings. It has been a process for me.
There is definitely an ebb and flow to life.
This is my story and this is all part of my life
I don’t want to be stuck here, but I also know I have to be patient. I have to move through this. its
just another hiccup in the road
The fact is, I really didn’t feel like doing this right now but I’ve got to, I know how important it is to be motivated and move forward. I had to cheer myself on to do this episode for me and to give you hope that when we are pushed to our limits there’s always a little more room to push back.
There is time to make those small steps to improve your life, regardless of what you are going through at any given time. For some of us, journaling or going for a walk does that or even reading to inspire us. These all have their benefits. But the biggest point I am trying to make is that you need to be doing something to take care of yourself and also to live our best life now.
So if you feel like you are struggling, Hang in there with me…
We can weather bigger storms than we think and the growth that we experience from these storms will forever change us and shape how we live moving forward.
Heal Your Body by Louise Hay on Amazon
Listen to this important episode to hear more.
How do you sail through life? Join me on this endeavor! I would love to grow this amazing support community!
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